It is interesting in Proverbs 15:4 that it says, “the tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, and a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.” It doesn’t say words but it says tongue and it says that our tongue has an effect on others.
I have been meditating on this scripture for several days now and I have read this verse in several different translations. In the New King James version it reads,”A wholesome tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.”
It reminds me of another scripture which I have memorized. “Let no unwholesome word proceed out of your mouth but such as is necessary for building others up that it may benefit those who need it.”
As I was meditating on these scriptures I became aware that it was most likely referring to more than just outright lying. It may have indicated manipulation. We all manipulate others to get what we want. I have a very good friend who is trying to stop manipulating others and I hold him accountable when he pulls that on me.
Sometimes honesty hurts and I don’t like hurting others so I will tell little white lies so that others don’t get hurt but in the long run I usually just hurt them more.
Jesus was honest with his words and He wasn’t always nice. He was very aggressive with the Pharisees but he was honest. There was no deceit in His words. There have been times when I have heard counsel from the Holy Spirit that was brutally honest but I had asked for honesty, so I was thankful for it. Jesus is the way, the truth, and the light so to manipulate or deceive others would not be within His character.
I think we all have layers of deceit that cover our hearts and once we stop lying to ourselves we may be strong enough to be honest with others. I believe if we draw close to God and ask Him to give us His words to say to others we may be able to confront with honesty.